10.5.06

“If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?”

That happens to be a quote by Yankee actor Stephen Wright. Funny no? Talking of heat waves, Delhi could do with some respite.

It's hot. So hot that I think it would not be unsual to melt like the Belgian seashell chocolates I have been nibbling on of late.Which is why I am not very keen on going out on assignments anywhere. The other night I happened to be at the Bali Beach Festival at Hotel Nikko. It was in the lawns, an open air affair. There were giant standing fans that sprinkled water around. As I strolled in, I felt droplets of water sprayed on me. It felt heavenly. There were cool cocktails and glasses of wine with all kind of Balinese starters being circulated around.

After a glass of wine and a chat with a photographer, I was bored. So bored that I started walking aimlessly and checking out the drinks being served at the bar. The drinks were beautiful and so made me feel like I was on a beach. Plus there was a lovely breeze blowing. I think it was the effect of so many fans at work. It's amazing how you can make a steaming place like Delhi turn into a breezy beachy kind of an affair with just the precise touches. I tried out a minty drink. Gah! It tasted awful. I settled down for the staid old orange juice. Yes, that was how bored I was. I called up VK and told her about a photographer she had a crush on. I used to hear about him constantly during our IIMC days. Naturally I was taken aback to meet him there of all places. He was quite a rude one in his own way. He told a fellow photographer, "Sir, please don't shave your hair off any more. You look like a coconut."

But VK was excited. I suspect he is the reason she came over to meet me. But I was glad. We tried out Nikko Sling, a cocktail with coconut water, gin, vodka, generous doses of cream and mango juice (it is one of the best drinks I've ever had) while we watched the Wendell Rodricks fashion show that was going on. I tried to introduce VK to her former crush but she kept acting coy and pulling me back. It quite took me back to my schoolgirl days.

Then I met Brett Lee. His guy-next-door attitude was quite refreshing. At one point we were moving to a quieter place when he made sure I picked up my mobile from the table. It was a touching gesture. None of the hangups that our so glorified dandy Indian cricketers have. He was pretty excited about getting married next month to his sweetheart. But then during the interview, I had to go ahead and goof up. He was speaking about his fears -- sharks. Now the way he said it, it sounded like shocks. So I asked, "Well, what kind of shocks? Do you mean electric shocks or being shocked by people?" He was quiet for a second. He looked stumped. Then he burst out laughing. As did his manager. "I said sharks. Those in the water," said Brett. One of those moments when you want to just disappear.

And what a contrast it was to the conference I attended where Rahul Dravid was there. The guy had so much attitude, I wonder how he lives with it. There is this thing that they have about blaming the media for everything that raises my hackles. "The media puts a spin on things. So I am not going to say anything to the BCCI through them," he kept on saying. He sounded so vindictive that the man whom I once was very attracted to sounded petty and repulsive. So much so that I didn't feel like running after him to talk to him. I wish our people could give these cricketers a wide berth. They need it.

Another thing I don't understand is when these guys come to a press conference, why do they act as if they are doing journalists a big favour by opening their mouth even once? The only time they look near to cordial is when they see a TV mike hovering nearby. There was the opening of a luxury pret store recently for which actresses Urmila and Raveena Tandon arrived in designer dresses. While Urmila was at her bitchy best, just pouting and posing for the shutterbugs and speaking only to NDTV, Raveena was the surprise package. Well, she was genuinely nice. I was talking to her along with a friend from another paper when this Total TV woman started nudging me and asked me to stop. Raveena turned to her and said, "You know these guys will ban you!" After a few seconds Total TV again started acting up. This time Ravs turned to her and shot out: "You have time na? Go have some food."

And on a totally different track, I bought a new mobile phone. A cheap Nokia. While buying which I was near tears. I was reminded of my former flip phone. The one which died in soap water.

32 comments:

8 by 52 said...

Bitch, I came there for the booze and you, in that order. If I had come there for him, I would have let you introduce me to him after you so lovingly promised to do so.

Anonymous said...

hahahahahahahahahahaha you are as cute as ever!

Sonia said...

wonder what Total TV Woman would write about Raveena if she had a blog! :)

sorry about the phone. sigh! unfortunately, i can relate, too well.

n.g. said...

my take is, that cricketers in other countries are 'chilled out' because the game isnt a religion to their fellow countrymen. if oz loses a match to bangladesh, ricky ponting's house doesnt get stoned and effigies of gilly dont get burnt in sidney sidewalks. they can afford to be like that. i dont blame indian cricketers if they behave the way dravid behaved. we make them behave that way. look at the hoohaa greg chappel's finger gesture made. compare this with this - glenn mcgrath asked shivnarine chanderpaul, standing right next to the stump mike 'so what does brian lara's dick taste like'? and shiv shrugged and said 'i dont know, ask your mother.' public reaction - nothing at all. here, there'd be riots.

ok. raveena tandon seems 'nice' because she has no work. she NEEDS to be nice to the media so she's portrayed as a nice, sweet person. after mohra, which was her biggest hit, she was a complete bitch for the longest time, till her career effectively ended with the monstrosity of a film called 'stumped' or run out or something. urmila doesnt have any work either, but at least she has the ramu camp as a faithful family who'll keep giving her some work till all her hair falls out.

delhi's hot? sheesh. fuck. i have to be there on 16th and 17th. what do i do?

Anonymous said...

Soap water eh? Ouch! I could never understand this hero worship and why reporters and journalists hover arnd them so much. I mean they are just humans like you and me so whats all this fuss abt?

Ah but thats jus me rambling away!

Anonymous said...

You might as well buy me a new phone too. Thanks to you, it's now held together by a cellotape. Yes, it's come to that :-) P

AB said...

8 by 52: I am heartbroken. I come second to booze:-( Well I tried my best to do the necessary bit so much so that if he had seen me he would have suspected me of nursing an elephant sized crush!

Anon: Is this P?

Sonia: Well Total TV woman asked for it. Now I remember how she was grabbing my hand and pressing it as if that would stop my questions.

And about the phone, I am consoling myself this way that after all a phone is meant to make and answer calls...It's doing that so maybe I should keep my trap shut.

Nish: Did McGrath actually say that? You are right. For sure it would have sparked a riot here. It is very very pissing off. Our attitude. That has created such a repulsive breed of professionals. Even a 19-year-old Suresh Raina has loads of useless attitude!

Hmmm...you know most film stars can't stop themselves from gushing when they see those damn TV mikes and make us print people wait for ages. It's a grouse I guess that's common to all print guys.

Aha welcome to the furnace (wicked grin)

Grey Shades: Two hours in soap water...And journalists have to hover. It's our job you know. Not that we can help it.

Anon: Ok madame P that's a nice identification. Now you will be a rich lady and hiking all the way to Germany. I want those Suhani Pitties:-)

mad angles said...

Lol@ Nish.

That 'shock' thing was sooo you!

And I know - their attitude that they're doing the world a favour by talking to the press just makes me want to slap them. Actually, I've decided, I will next time.

AB said...

Essar: And horses will fly and I will stop eating chocolates:-)

mad angles said...

AB: You and your chocolates - why dont you share some of them with me now?

AB said...

They are over. Do you think I could leave them alone?

Rohini said...

The Bali Beach Festival sounds divine. I miss my nightlife... :(

Anonymous said...

It'd be interesting to hear how the soap water and the phone met in the first place! ;)

AB said...

Rohini: It was, it was. As VK said, the drinks and everything toegther made you feel like going to Bali.

Grey Shades: Well, I had returned from my dance class and was very tired. So I emptied my bag and dropped into a bucket of Surf Excel. Some two hours later I started missing my mobile. And there was this bad feeling I had. I went and checked. Sure as hell it was in the pouch of the bag:(

Sue said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sue said...

I got my Nokia 3315 wet for about 4 min (I swear no more) in some strong rain and it was never the same machine again. The Nokia ppl said it refused to run on anything but the 3310 software... so I exchanged phones with my father :-)

AB said...

Sue: Hmmm...that's convenient:0) Sadly my dad's in another city or I would have probably hijacked his.

Mint Chutney said...

You painted a lovely picture with the fan and the breeze and the drinks. The part about the sharks cracked me up.

My sister's hubby is an engineer who designs cell phones. The prototype she has has looks so fancy but has a range of 5 feet in any direction (unless there's rain in which case it drops to 3 feet).

Anonymous said...

Ouch! Hope you gave your phone a decent buriel! So you into dancing too? What forms?

AB said...

Mint: 5 feet! Omigosh...Now that is really fancy and sounds way beyond my financial radar.

Grey Shades: I returned it to its maker.

Salsa and jive. But I have decided to give it a break. It's unbelievably hot and I don't fancy melting in my partner's arms:-)

Anonymous said...

Lol! I was learning salsa for abt six months before hectic professional life intervened... but its way too much fun to give up! :)

AB said...

Well that it is if you have the right guy. The first partner I had was overweight and kept stepping on my toes and the second one was a 40-yr-old shmuck who messed up the steps real bad...

Anonymous said...

Ouch! that gotta hurt. Fortunately for me I had a decent partner who was atleast in sync with me. Did a little bit of jiving too. I love the free-spirited and do-your-own-thing bit of it! Oh and some of the moves are jus jaw dropping :)

shub said...

:O Brett lee?! wow! Damn I didn't need to read the part about Rahul Dravid :'(. Anyway I will pretend I never read it and go back to idle...err idol worshipping him! :D

Mint Chutney said...

Um, I wasn't sure if you were being funny but five feet is not far. For example, I'm taller than 5 feet.

Shark-Shock. hee hee

: )

Anonymous said...

Say did you finally get your Manolo Blahniks? :)

AB said...

Grey Shades: Those Manolo Blahniks are still in the racks:( The day I get them I don't know what I will do...

Shub: Yeah isn't it really sad? Especially since I have been in love with him since I was a teenager.

Mint: Yet another...I am tired of my goof ups... So here, I will pretend I was being funny:)

Anonymous said...

You could go dancing! :)

AB said...

Yeah baby yeah;)

Anonymous said...

Jus dont melt away! ;) BTW they are playing Shall We Dance today... You've seen that one? Man JLo dances so very awesome in that one!

AB said...

:-) No I won't. I loved the movie because of the nice feel it had. Needless to say I loved the Richard Gere factor more than I admired JLo's moves. But yes she was pretty good.

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