That happens to be a quote by Yankee actor Stephen Wright. Funny no? Talking of heat waves, Delhi could do with some respite.
It's hot. So hot that I think it would not be unsual to melt like the Belgian seashell chocolates I have been nibbling on of late.Which is why I am not very keen on going out on assignments anywhere. The other night I happened to be at the Bali Beach Festival at Hotel Nikko. It was in the lawns, an open air affair. There were giant standing fans that sprinkled water around. As I strolled in, I felt droplets of water sprayed on me. It felt heavenly. There were cool cocktails and glasses of wine with all kind of Balinese starters being circulated around.
After a glass of wine and a chat with a photographer, I was bored. So bored that I started walking aimlessly and checking out the drinks being served at the bar. The drinks were beautiful and so made me feel like I was on a beach. Plus there was a lovely breeze blowing. I think it was the effect of so many fans at work. It's amazing how you can make a steaming place like Delhi turn into a breezy beachy kind of an affair with just the precise touches. I tried out a minty drink. Gah! It tasted awful. I settled down for the staid old orange juice. Yes, that was how bored I was. I called up VK and told her about a photographer she had a crush on. I used to hear about him constantly during our IIMC days. Naturally I was taken aback to meet him there of all places. He was quite a rude one in his own way. He told a fellow photographer, "Sir, please don't shave your hair off any more. You look like a coconut."
But VK was excited. I suspect he is the reason she came over to meet me. But I was glad. We tried out Nikko Sling, a cocktail with coconut water, gin, vodka, generous doses of cream and mango juice (it is one of the best drinks I've ever had) while we watched the Wendell Rodricks fashion show that was going on. I tried to introduce VK to her former crush but she kept acting coy and pulling me back. It quite took me back to my schoolgirl days.
Then I met Brett Lee. His guy-next-door attitude was quite refreshing. At one point we were moving to a quieter place when he made sure I picked up my mobile from the table. It was a touching gesture. None of the hangups that our so glorified dandy Indian cricketers have. He was pretty excited about getting married next month to his sweetheart. But then during the interview, I had to go ahead and goof up. He was speaking about his fears -- sharks. Now the way he said it, it sounded like shocks. So I asked, "Well, what kind of shocks? Do you mean electric shocks or being shocked by people?" He was quiet for a second. He looked stumped. Then he burst out laughing. As did his manager. "I said sharks. Those in the water," said Brett. One of those moments when you want to just disappear.
And what a contrast it was to the conference I attended where Rahul Dravid was there. The guy had so much attitude, I wonder how he lives with it. There is this thing that they have about blaming the media for everything that raises my hackles. "The media puts a spin on things. So I am not going to say anything to the BCCI through them," he kept on saying. He sounded so vindictive that the man whom I once was very attracted to sounded petty and repulsive. So much so that I didn't feel like running after him to talk to him. I wish our people could give these cricketers a wide berth. They need it.
Another thing I don't understand is when these guys come to a press conference, why do they act as if they are doing journalists a big favour by opening their mouth even once? The only time they look near to cordial is when they see a TV mike hovering nearby. There was the opening of a luxury pret store recently for which actresses Urmila and Raveena Tandon arrived in designer dresses. While Urmila was at her bitchy best, just pouting and posing for the shutterbugs and speaking only to NDTV, Raveena was the surprise package. Well, she was genuinely nice. I was talking to her along with a friend from another paper when this Total TV woman started nudging me and asked me to stop. Raveena turned to her and said, "You know these guys will ban you!" After a few seconds Total TV again started acting up. This time Ravs turned to her and shot out: "You have time na? Go have some food."
And on a totally different track, I bought a new mobile phone. A cheap Nokia. While buying which I was near tears. I was reminded of my former flip phone. The one which died in soap water.